Fashion faux pas

I was going through Bangalore Times yesterday, as part of my daily after college ritual. Along with all the loads of celebrity gossip and the various completely idiotic yet completely convincing relationship advice, there are also posts on fashion. All these days I was ignoring these articles and yesterday, in a fit of boredom I actually did read the complete article.

It was worth it! My fashion sense still remains zero but I did manage to have a good laugh. I don't understand fashion.
Firstly, all those horrible things they do to clothes just makes it seem like a waste of good cloth.
Secondly, most of the things they drape models with rarely fits anybody other than them.
Thirdly, most of their designs (especially the summer collection) seems too garish to wear in decent company.

Some of the clothes that do make it to the market (and are wearable) are too bloody expensive for the common man to purchase. Such being the case, I wonder how that whole industry survives on the clothing equivalent of gluttony on the part of a few millionaires.

Most importantly, I doubt if many people understand fashion. I was reading about the "fashion advice" that these fashion gurus give to people like us. And how moronic are all of us who go by their taste of clothing. Something that they say is suddenly the "in thing" and something that somebody refuses to use suddenly becomes outdated. There are few people who pull the fashion strings and crown themselves the fashion-makers.

Should we let the tastes of a few people rule our cupboards? Should we lets the whims and fancies of a few people allow us to mimic stars and lose our individuality? I don't think so. Fashion is surprisingly one of the biggest industries today and I suppose there are many out there who disagree with me.

A beautiful woman looks beautiful in whatever she wears (the gay types please look elsewhere). I don't think that by wearing pink shoes with a black dress suddenly makes her sprout hitherto unseen pimples and freckles and suddenly go out of shape and make her look hideous.

Beauty is skin deep!

And don't get me started with the "bikini collection". Nobody cares what damn designs you do on them. They are never seen or noticed. If you do start looking at the designs then you must seriously reconsider you orientation.

Ciao

Hostly Duties

I had the opportunity to go to a function(along with my family of course) the past weekend. It was a religious event and hence the host's duties were limited.

This post is a critical examination on the multifaceted duties a host has to play... with more stress on food.

Hostly Duty (H.D) 1: It is imperative that you cook for twice the number of people you have invited. This is for 2 reasons. Running out of food is disastrous. It gives you licence to perform the following HDs.

H.D.2: There is no such thing as a full stomach. Loading the plates of the guests until they are an inch from puking on you is considered a very gracious thing to do.

H.D.3: From H.D.1, it can be inferred that there will be lots of food left after lunch. Have a backup guest list to fall back to to clear all that good food for the night.

H.D.4: Insulting, taunting and angering thin people during lunch and dinner is an "ok" thing to do (not if you are the one being taunted).

H.D.5: Dialogues of self loathing after serving one round of food or talking about one's limited expertise when it comes to cooking is observed to be the best way to end anybody's hopes of criticizing your food.

H.D.6: Be careful and don't let anybody serve you your food. (People like me are always waiting to take revenge).


This probably happens in every house (with a few minor changes of course). It is quite amusing that guests, even with the prospect of undergoing such torture, feel let-down and insulted if they are not tortured.

Ciao..

Conversations

In life we have to put up with a lot of things. A lot of nonsense, a lot of people, a lot of supposed intellectuals and instances where all you can do is smile and say "you are right" even though your brain is screaming at you to correct a factual error or just a downright idiotic deduction.

With friends, one has the liberty of stopping the other person or interrupting him in any way possible and put in your point of view. People doing that (me, mostly) are often unwelcome guests in a conversation. And some people (me again!) learn to put up with that and smile inwardly looking at people making a fool of themselves.

It is even more irritating during group conversations among relatives, usually during a function. All the supposed intellectuals come out with all their fine oratory skills to impress a point, often a misinterpretation or a devastatingly idiotic deduction, upon the non-attention-seeking crowd. The ones who are not blessed with the same oratory skills butt in the middle to add mirch masala (read more nonsense), with constant nodding of the head.

Please do not mistake me. It is a treat to listen to people who actually know what they are speaking about.

The usual ice breaker when it comes to a group conversation is politics. And after the usual cursing of all the people and policies of the government, the quasi orators take central stage in discussing a recent political event. Some of the wannabe orators usually come up with a good Deve Gowda curse and the others stop their respective conversations to curse in unanimity. The wannabe then stops with a smug smile on his face.

Then begins the fun part... Especially when they discuss modern technology. example iPhone 4. Some of the features attributed to the iPhone make it seem like a supercomputer! Then there is always another group which will be discussing banking and economics. The conversations are usually loaded with big words like economic instability, self correction mode of the market, etc etc which no one understands, but to which everyone nods their heads.

And in every family, there is always someone who is from Amway and keeps trying to get other to join the network marketing chain.

I might be wrong, I might be right. In either case, this was my observation in a recent function.

Cheers

P.S. Happy Birthday Mahatma Gandhi!
P.P.S Happy birthday to my mobile :)